Note: I wrote this post months ago and kept putting off publishing it. Now, after a 3-week hiatus from homeschooling (not to mention blogging) due to travel and an unexpected hurricane week, it seems like the right time.

Shortly after we decided to homeschool our kids – about six years ago now – I went to a social event for homeschooling moms. The purpose of the get-together was to meet other moms in the area and discuss how our homeschooling journey was going. I knew I needed all the help I could get, so I was excited to sign up.

The woman who hosted it was basically who I considered to be the ideal homeschooling mom. Her kids were respectful and sweet, her house was always clean without being overly sterile, and more than anything, she had a sense of calm composure that I wished I could replicate in myself and, by extension, my family. She was one of those people who always left me wondering, “How does she do it?”. 

There was a mom at this get-together who was complaining about being behind on housework. She related the feeling of helplessness familiar to so many homeschooling parents attempting to teach their older kids with small children running around and wreaking havoc.

 How could she ever have both an orderly home and a successful homeschool routine? Would her kids ever learn anything? And would her house ever be clean again?

Several people offered their two cents about implementing chore charts, establishing morning routines, or just accepting the chaos.  I was eager to hear what our hostess had to say. Maybe she would have some brilliant flow chart to share or a rigorous daily spreadsheet that unlocked the secrets to her success. 

But instead, after everyone had given their advice, she offered a yet-unspoken solution:

“You could just take a day off school.” 

What??! Scandalous!! 

This advice was shocking enough to my newbie-homeschooling ears, but she kept going.

 “You could even take a few days,” she said. “Or a week or two! Whatever helps you regain your peace.”

At the time, this advice was revolutionary for me. My two daughters had been in school up to this point, and my husband was a school principal. The idea of “just taking off school” to clean your house or seemed ridiculous. How would this homeschooling thing ever work if I decided to take the day off when I got behind on the dishes? My kids would never learn anything!

Our fifth child was born about three months later and suddenly this advice became more appealing. Now I was willing to give this approach a try. I don’t know how many days we took off during those first few months postpartum, but I’m pretty sure it was at least equal to the number of full school days we had. And I’m certain that when we started back up in full swing, it was the happiest we had been since we started homeschooling. 

Stop Juggling

I’ve noticed a common theme in a lot of the homeschooling blogs I’ve read, and it goes something like this: If you feel overwhelmed by housework, just accept the chaos. Acknowledge that things don’t have to be immaculate and orderly. Don’t worry about the disorder, and just carry on as best you can with the seemingly impossible juggling act.

Now don’t get me wrong – sometimes I do need to push through and keep up with school even though things are falling apart. However, sometimes that doesn’t work, and I continue to feel completely overwhelmed and agitated. If that stress starts to spread and permeate our daily life, I prefer to just take some time off school.  I just stop juggling and try to focus on one thing at a time. Once that’s under control, I move on. 

So take a day to deep clean your kitchen, catch up on laundry, or organize that one closet that’s been driving you insane. 

Take another day to prep food because your evenings are busy and you need freezer meals, but don’t have time to meal prep and homeschool. 

Take another day to plan out your calendar for the next few weeks so you don’t feel like you’re already behind on tomorrow when you go to sleep tonight. 

And if you have older kids who are capable of helping, take this approach a step further and involve them. Give your kids projects to work on to help you get caught up. Teach your son or daughter how to do all that laundry that’s piled up, or delegate some of that meal prep to one of your kids so you can focus on something else.

After all – it’s a learning opportunity! You don’t even have to count these as “days off” if that terrifies you as much as it did me when I started homeschooling. Consider them “Home Economics” credits.

For our family, I’ve realized that frantic, stressful school days are counterproductive. Sometimes I need to let go of the rigid school routines, the overly ambitious checklists, and the need to have a full school day.

In the end, taking time off when it’s warranted always helps us accomplish more in the long run – and we’re all a lot happier when we do sit down to do the work.